List of the Week aka Just Friends, v. 2

This week, the post features a list of things I will miss about this boy. I was thinking of writing it entry-style like I did at the end of last year, but figured this way I'll kill both birds. After all, what better theme for a list of the week than a run down memory lane full of uncomfortable, awkward, kinda-makes-you-cringe-every-time-you-think-about-them sweet old memories? This time there's a lot more to say anyway.

Things I'll miss

1. Our ridiculous, at times completely inappropriate and at all times frustrating stubbornness.
2. Catching a glimpse of your head in-between people I really don't care about
3. (And you're not hard to spot, you have a total of like six shirts that you rotate every now and then)
4. Walking - more realistically, shoving and pushing - through the crowd to where you're standing, making quick expressionless eye contact (I am so breezy) and continuing on my way, wondering what thought crossed your mind in that fraction of a second
5. The jokes that didn't ever make much sense
6. Comfortable laughs
7. Simple, unspoken understanding
8. How I could always count on a conversation whenever my day was crappy (and that was like 28 days out of each month)
9. The long, long talks every night that were the reason homework wasn't finished and bedtime came at 1, sometimes 2
10. How I told you absolutely everything (too much, apparently)
11. Your sober, practical, slightly jealous point of view that I turned to when the girls' got overcliched and annoying
12. Your taste in music that I rarely liked
13. Your equally strange taste in movies that were usually overdone
14. Except for When Harry Met Sally, that one was good. And I remember that's not where everything started with us but it just made things more complicated.
15. Your hands, which were so rough from doing what you love to do (that's what she said (not really heheh (well kind of... but that's not what I mean)))
16. Your endless search for a fitting compliment that just ended up making me laugh anyway
17. How you could always notice the small things, but didn't always understand them
18. Watching you stand all cute and shy at Starbucks
19. How, no matter how amazing of a day I was having in New York, I couldn't wait to get to the hotel room to tell you all about it
20. Which reminds me: I'll miss calling you in the airport to say goodbye, in case our plane crashed
21. Directing my many AIM statuses at you
22. Singing (and I think it's time to agree that I am loads better)
23. Making faces when I should have been paying attention during a class with a teacher FROM THE DARKEST PITS OF HELL
24. The couch, your laptop burning your thighs
25. (I watched that show till the end, you know. The very last episode.)
26. Your face when it got really, really serious. Which, honestly, scared me a little
27. Your naive plans for us, for me. Didn't I tell you it was a one-way road I was on?
28. How you were outside your house barefoot in December talking to me on the phone because you couldn't do it otherwise
29. Most importantly, I'll miss how you forgave me. You forgave me for my little Christmas surprise, and you forgave me for what happened the day after.

But dammit, I wish you'd forgive me for my choice. Now that the year is winding down and I'm getting ready to pack my bags for the Dominican, there's nothing I want more than to leave on a good note. You say you're over it, but you clearly haven't moved past it. Obviously, things will not go back to normal; but they sure as hell aren't gonna move anywhere if you keep them at this stalemate. You've gotta start somewhere. One word, some effort. What you're afraid of won't even matter now since we may never see each other again. There'll be no more glances, no more smiles -

There’ll be no more grabbing my hand to pat it as one of our many inside jokes and no more sharing the worst pickup lines that involve touching body parts of the opposite sex (in appropriate places, of course). No more yelling across the hall about how great my ass looks in those jeans because you knew that made me insanely uncomfortable, and you’ve always enjoyed my misery.


I miss being just friends. I guess I never got used to it.



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EARLY list of the week

I will make the official monday List of the Week tomorrow, but since I haven't updated in ten years, this week will have two. So, to kick things off, here is a special Sunday edition.

List of reasons why I love Deniz

1. She laughs at all of my jokes. Seriously. Even the bad ones.
2. Therefore we both have an identical, and purely awesome, sense of humor.
3. In the most embarrassing situations, she will make a miserable puppy face and then erupt in sad laughter, which makes everyone around erupt in real laughter and then she forgets why she was sad in the first place
4. She is there in all of my sing-trip-and-fall moments, and she never fails to point and elicit this manly BWHA before closing her eyes and holding her stomach because the laughter is so intense it can make her pee
5. Her sarcastic moments are so painfully obvious that each time she has one, I remember why I fell in love with this talent that is only perfected by a few.
6. She has this magical way of making me laugh after I think I'll never smile again
7. She is the most genuine person I've ever met, hands down. She gives the most heartfelt advice even on issues she's never come close to dealing with, and even if that advice is off-base, the idea that she only means the best is enough to heal a real shitty mood
8. She says things like "agility" and "booger" in reference to people
9. She wanted me to be in her senior showcase dance. So of course I love her for that.
10. Her mother's reading list includes comic books, travel magazines, and the Twilight series
11. She's going to a college just a few hours away from where I'll be staying, in a state that has a bowling alley. And a mall!
12. She falls in love with boys who do nice things, like hold the door or pick up eggshells. Therefore it is not uncommon if she is in love with 6 guys at the same time
13. If I do something strange in a public place, like pull my head down to my plate at a restaurant and make whale noises into the glass cup because I like the effect the arrangement of glass makes on my voice, she'll pull her head down and whale along with me
14. If I bitch about someone, she bitches about that person using bigger and better words. See reason #8 above
15. There aren't enough reasons in the world to describe why I love this ridiculously special person, but if you haven't had the chance to get to know her, you're missing out on a huge chunk of life. It's like going to Great America and not going on Invertigo. So next time you see Deniz, smile and wave, and she'll undoubtedly light up and do the same for you.

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I was going to tell him about a college I got into

me: so guess what
fred: you have a rare but lethal strain of staff flowing througout your body and you wont survive unless i give you a blood transfusion
but its a risky procedure
and it might kill the both of us
me: but you'll do it for ME, right
fred: oh of course
im a bellarmine boy
im a man for others
me: you sit on the couch and play with yourself
dont forget that part
fred: esp the part where im a badass fairy
me: hahahaaha
anyways
GUESS WHAT
fred: oh i wasnt right the first time
shit



No moping can last too long with people like these around.


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Why I love my friends

In honor of getting my license, Sanaz rushed over with a chocolate cake that boldly spelled out Congratulations Mooshoo (until a third of it was eaten).



Jess and Marina stopped by for a reunion we haven't had since last year. We talked, laughed, cried (ahem Marina), and complained about the people that make things difficult. Then Marmar drove us to Peet's coffee, where an elderly black woman complimented mine and Jess' rendition of the Laguna Biotch theme song.

I made reservations in Pasta Pomodoro for tomorrow night. If everything goes by the plan, I'll take my newly acquired license over to Santana Row and enjoy the much-overdue dinner with a friend. A new old friend.

Talking about pasta and reservations made Sanaz hungry. She picked me and Leeza up for an impromptu 9 PM dinner at a Mediterranean restaurant on University Avenue, where we bitched some more about people who make life difficult. A falafel, three kabobs, and two and a half baklavas later, we were on our way to spend the evening at her house.

What an evening that was! As if molesting her cat Sedrick wasn't enough, we made fun of Jennifer... not sure how she relates to the family. From what I got, she's a 40 year old who stays over at their house and drinks all their wine. We spent the rest of the night hanging out with S's older brother and his friend, who had enough drunk and road rage stories to make Leeza make a few bathroom runs.

Bleh. I'm so tired I can barely type. Basically, this was just the kind of friday I was looking for this month. Because when I feel like being alone is a bad idea, there's people that remind me it doesn't have to be that way. 

This is why I love my friends.

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